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Now you've done that - what's next?

goals look behind you Nov 11, 2022

An important part of getting things done the Gentle Rebel way is to notice your own personal rhythms.


When the world around us shouts “what's next?” it can be oh SO easy to slip back into that old pushy way of moving through our day - especially just after hitting a major goal - I’m Neutrally Noticing my own words there with a smile and so am going to have to pause this sentence and examine them with you…


‘Hitting a major goal’ - ugh that sounds painful and not very much fun! I can feel my nose getting squished as I slam myself into that said goal.


How about ‘achieving a goal’? Although even the word ‘achievement’ gets challenged in The One Minute Marke because we can get sucked into constant achievement and judging ourselves by our consistent failure to achieve everything all at once.


The One Minute Marke gives you an opportunity to notice this pushing to constantly achieve in order to feel worthy, good enough, happy, safe, at ease - so that you can start to do things your way. And feel all those essential things anyway (they are not found at the end of your goals).


The Gentle Rebel commits to herself first - to doing things her way. To uncovering what that means and feels like for her.


This does not mean not achieving. It means the opposite. It means we get to focus on what we really want and achieve it in a way that feels good to us.


This means slowing down and noticing how we are doing things - so that we can respond rather than react. 


So, back to the noticing your own rhythms around the achievement of goals. If I take my own example right now of having just published my book - unless I purposely take time to notice how good it feels to be a published author, to feel the weight of the book released from my body, to separate myself from its success (so that I am not on an emotional rollercoaster where my happiness depends on what it is up to as it makes its way into the wild), to celebrate myself and my commitment to my mission, to you, to myself, to my business - then what was the point?

Firstly, if I don’t do these things and take time to pause and notice, I am out of congruency with my own work and the words of the book (see Look Behind You near the end) so that can’t happen as integrity is one of my core values.

Secondly, I get sucked back into that old way of living where you’re racing to the finish line and missing the journey. Right now is all there is. And although I’ve decided my life just gets better and better unless I take time to Look Behind Me how would I know this to be true? I wouldn’t. I’d miss it all.


Thirdly, for me (and for at least one member of Get Your Life Back Alumni who prompted this blog this morning - thank you) I know that after each major goal being reached I tend to what I used to call ‘fall in a hole’ and what I would now call need some ‘meandering time’.

The reason I am able to look at this post-achievement time so positively is because I have learnt to trust myself more. To let go and allow myself to meander is a time of integration of the achievement and all the goodness that comes with it but can so easily be missed; a nourishing time without a goal; a time to declutter (I’m freecycling and eBaying and burning business journals and have painted my office).

But I know that very soon (and actually it’s happened superfast this time!) the next step will emerge (or in my case, several paths all at once which turn out to all lead to the same place beautifully - yes, I'm amazed at the joy of writing those words).


What has happened to you after achieving major goals in your life?

Can you see a repeating circle?


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